December 22


Dozing by the fireside, wake up to breakfast, roasting in the oven.

December 21


Dear Reader,

As the end of the year approaches it is time to renew your subscription. It’s gone up. It’s gone up loads.

Thank you in advance for your continued support. We like your money. We like it loads.

Yours sincerely,
The London Review of Bricks

December 20


Times was hard.
It looked like he would have to replace the pretty young girl masseuse with the ugly old lady masseuse.
That’s how hard times was.

December 19


Everything had been so exciting for so long. It was difficult to know why he was still awake. The delivery man knocked at the door with the weekly medication.

December 18


Yet men have we, whom we revere,
Now names, and men still housing here,
Whose lives, by many a battle-dint
Defaced, and grinding wheels on flint,
Yield substance, though they sing not . . .

            – George Meredith, from “The Lark Ascending”

December 17



When I grow up I will sleep with a great poet
And won’t he (or she: I haven’t decided yet) know it ?!?!
(I will add some more lines to this later. I have to do my homework now.)

December 16



Some famous poets wear socks not quite white
And some famous poets wet their bed in the night
Some famous poets are not very good
And some famous poets have brains made of wood
Some famous poets bore me to tears
(My Mum says I’m wise way beyond my years)

December 15



The Golden Age Of Streams
The Waist Band
The Idiot & The Oddity
The Turned And The Screwed
The Witless Weddings
The Decanters
The AC/DC Murders
The Dark Descending
The Titles For Poems Not Yet Written

December 14


He gave me a bag made of the skin taken off a nine-year
ox, stuffed full inside with the courses of all the blowing
winds, for the son of Kronos had set him in charge over
the winds, to hold them still or start them up at his pleasure.
He stowed it away in the hollow ship, tied fast with a silver
string, so there should be no wrong breath of wind, not even
a little, but set the West Wind free to blow me and carry
the ships and the men aboard them on their way; but it was not
so to be, for we were ruined by our own folly.

            – Homer, The Odyssey, Book X (trans. Richmond Lattimore)

December 13


— I am tempted to say that “Pond Life” just about sums it up.
— Life in a pond is very interesting. Teeming, as some might say.
— Some might say it is more interesting than poems about it.
— I am tempted to say that today’s “Cracker Jokes” are more fun.
— Are you saying that jokes are preferable to poems?
— As if! Though some might say . . .